Meaty Misunderstandings

Peyton Fulbright, Stampede Reporter

March madness may be in basketball, but MMA has had some fighters with some serious “roid rage” this month.

                Hulking behemoth and self proclaimed horse meat-eater Alistair Overeem tested positive for elevated testosterone levels, and “King Mo” Lawal was released from Strikeforce due to failing a drug test and calling an athletic commission member a derogatory term and a racist.

                Lawal recently tested positive for an illegal over the counter substance. Not a big enough problem for him to lose his job, it would just be a fine and a suspension. However, his desire to go to Twitter and express his anger cost him the job.

                Commissioner Pat Lundvall asked him in court if he understood English, and if he could read and write.

                One could see how Lundvall’s question could seem racist, considering how Lawal is black. Lawal certainly took it that way, but Lundvall said she handles all of her cases in that matter, because of all the foreign athletes who compete in America.

                Personally, I think Lawal took it the wrong way. In court, it’s something she has to ask, it was in no way an attempt to be racist.

                Since losing his job for the angry Tweet, Lawal has apologized, but you have to wonder how sincere it is, considering the circumstances.

                In the biggest news of the month, Overeem’s testosterone: epitestosterone levels were over double the legal limit, and fourteen times larger than what 95% of men have. 95% of men have levels of 3.7:1, and 99% of men have levels of 5:1. The Nevada State Athletic Commission allows 6:1 levels to accommodate every man. Upon testing, Overeem’s levels were off the charts at 14:1.

                Overeem was supposed to fight heavy weight champion Junior Dos Santos in May, in what was to be one of the biggest heavy weight fights ever, and one of the biggest fights of the year.( literally and figuratively)

                As everyone knows, Overeem went from being sticks and bones to having the biggest muscles of any fighter, all in one year. He put on approximately forty pounds of muscles in under a year; an inhuman feat.

                According to him, he didn’t use any illegal supplements, he just has great genetics, can’t hold fat, naturally high testosterone levels, and a hearty diet of horse meat. He may of naturally high testosterone, but 14:1 isn’t possible naturally.

                For now, we’ll have to wait and see if he will somehow have a good enough explanation to be able to fight Dos Santos. More likely, he’ll be cut from the UFC, and someone will replace him in the fight.